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[cosmolinguist]

I had a whole day to chill and work on uni stuff...so I've done absolutely nothing, literally. Could only get myself to touch my laptop by saying it was just to write a blog entry for today. And it's not that I've been enjoying myself: just sitting around paralytic, anxious and self-loathing. My depression and executive dysfunction are eating me alive and I'm so scared about not getting everything done in time.

Have to go back to work again already tomorrow.

Comments

[angelofthenorth]

Hugs. I know this well

[cosmolinguist]

Hugs. I wish you didn't, but at least we don't havle to suffer alone.

[worlds_of_smoke]

lordy. i know what you mean. i spent all day trying to pull myself away from tumblr and to do something, anything.

whatever is in the air can fuck off already and let us live our lives instead of being terrified.

[cosmolinguist]

Amen to that!

[jesse_the_k]

Reading, sending streams of blissful hope.

[cosmolinguist]

Thank you so much.

[steorra]

offers tea

[cosmolinguist]

I am drinking cinnamon tea now, one of my favorites, and it does seem to be helping. :) Thanks.

[steorra]

Yay tea goodness.

[otter]

Sounds like my December. What I tell myself when that happens is "tomorrow will be different". It may not be better, but different at least means I'm not stuck repeating today.

*hugs* and good luck shifting into whichever direction you want to go.

[cosmolinguist]

Today has been better: I've had to go to work on five hours' sleep (my brain that wouldn't do anything else wouldn't sleep either apparently!) but having to go to work has given me the necessary, external, push to like get up and get dressed and go out and everything, and usually once I've done that I'm okay.

[silveradept]

Support from this corner.

[cosmolinguist]

Thank you.

[rmc28]

Sympathies :-(

Yr broken life is my broken life

[softfruit]

Gah. This is the story of my Christmas break and now I hate myself for not getting anything done over the holiday. So much so I like that I'm back in work as at least there is "I went to work" to prove I lived that day.

Or "Empathy" to put that in short! :/

Re: Yr broken life is my broken life

[cosmolinguist]

So much so I like that I'm back in work as at least there is "I went to work" to prove I lived that day.

Oh this is so relatable. A lot of my problems have been that I haven't (between traveling, family, and essays with January deadlines) had a break at all, but especially since we've gotten back I've really needed one. So as soon as I'm back to not having the immediate demands and structure (of work and going to uni and then Christmas with my family), my brain is just completely incapable of letting me structure my time usefully or healthily. It's gonna take that break it needs, dammit! Even if it has to fuck me up to do it.

[alithea]

*hugs* and sympathy - I am very familiar with that state of affairs. I hope you're feeling a bit better today.

[cosmolinguist]

I am a bit, getting up for work was hard but I did it and it's probably helped. Thanks.

[lucymorningstar]

Ugh, I hate those days. I'm sorry :(

[cosmolinguist]

Horrible, aren't they. Thank you.

[theandrewhickey]

I love you. I wish I could do more to help.