Background radiation

[cosmolinguist]

I went to lift club this morning and left it not feeling briefly euphoric as usual but instead nothing at all. I had seen cool people, I'd done the best exercise my body has available to it, and all this only got me up to about neutral.

I went to the RNCM, for the first time in at least five years but probably longer, to see a brass band with angelofthenorth. It was such a treat thar she'd sorted this all out for us. Great to have someone to talk with afterward: we had practically opposite rankings of the four pieces we'd heard which amused me. As she was listing hers, someone a few rows ahead who was also getting ready to leave overheard and said "I thought exactly the same!"

I told her that I didn't feel like I was thinking a lot about Minneapolis but looking at how poorly I'm functioning at everything, it's clearly taking up a lot of my usual abilities. Background radiation, she said, and yes that's it exactly.

This afternoon, V filled their pill boxes for the upcoming week had noticed that they didn't receive more of something that they thought they had. (They're so contentious but with so many prescriptions -- especially when they're low on spoons for an extended period (flare? new problem? just coincidence? no way to know!) -- it's easy for something like this to happen.) And of course it's one with hideous withdrawal symptoms. And of course it's the weekend.

I was fully prepared to leave D to make dinner while I was on hold waiting for NHS 111, but I found out you can do this online now! So I spent a relatively painless few minutes typing things into the website and then D drove us both to the pharmacy. After a bunch more questions, which luckily I was prepared (enough) for, we emerged victorious with three days of meds, enough to get us to a weekday when this can be sorted out properly.

We had takeout for dinner.

And then I saw that ICE have executed someone else. My brain and body seem to have shut down at this news.

I'm very glad that V has their meds now. They were so stressed and miserable at the thought of having to go without them. They take them in the evening so I'm glad we could figure out a solution before the meds were even overdue.

Tomorrow will be a busy day being helpful to V's relative who's clearing out his mother's house. I'm looking forward to the physical labor for something I'm not emotionally invested in.

I hope I sleep.

Comments

[angelofthenorth]

Hugs.

I keep thinking of the Manic Street Preachers song : if you tolerate this...
But it's never "their" kids. It's ours, in some way. I wish there was something I could do, beyond preaching, teaching and organizing concert trips.

Time spent with friends is time well spent though.

[cosmolinguist]

You're doing a lot. <3

[otter]

Love you. I'm in a sort of state of numbness myself, and every so often start to cry.

[sfred]

Thinking of you.

[barakta]

I'm sorry, that sounds miserable. Can you let your work people know you are struggling so they can be extra nice to you.

Well done for sorting Vee's meds, that is significant when your brain is on reduced functioning. So pleased 111 could help quickly enough for the problem not to arise. Tracking meds is SUCH a pain and they often issue in different amounts which makes it all harder.