[personal profile] cosmolinguist
So a guy I've never heard of but apparently other people have because he is -- or, was -- on Celebrity Big Brother said some biphobic things: bisexuality is "the worst type" of sexuality, AIDS is "a bisexual disease", bisexuals ruin relationships"...

You know. All the usual things.

The unusual thing, though, is that this time people seem to be taking notice.


The CEO of Stonewall wrote about this in the Guardian. (I can almost forgive all the propaganda for themselves just because a few short years ago I never would've expected to say Stonewall's publicly condeming biphobia!) Stonewall, along with other not-often-friend-to-bisexuals Peter Tatchell, have banned him from hosting events until he apologizes to bisexuals. Twitter was unimpressed (including a lot of my friends, which is how non-TV-having-me found out about this). Biggins was even removed from Celebrity Big Brother, though since he also made a "joke" about the Holocaust it's unclear whether the biphobia alone would've been a banning offense.

Biggins's apology -- if you can call it that -- as quoted in that Gay Star News article is the epitome of the "I'm not sorry I did it, I'm just sorry people are yelling at me" kind of apology public figures have to produce when they've gotten caught saying what they actually think:
‘I am mortified by what’s happened, really mortified,’ he said. ‘I have a lot of bisexual friends and I’m not in any way a bigoted person.’

But he continued: ‘But I think they do fuck up a lot of relationships.’
After a moment to laugh at how, as is so often the case with the fauxpology (I hope it takes a better apology than this to get Stonewall and Peter Tatchell and other LGBT groups to end their ban on Biggins!), the person's real opinions can't help but escape at the end there, I considered the "I'm mortified...lot of bisexual friends...not a bigoted person" bit.

While a lot of people know that the "I'm not racist, I have black friends!" construction (substituting other bigotries for "racist" and other kinds of "friends" as necessary) is a bad thing to say, maybe we don't talk enough about why. Because people, like Biggins here, still seem to think that friendship is a guarantee that you are not, cannot, never will be, able to commit a form of bigotry against any group your friend is part of. The unspoken follow-up seems to be "if I were biphobic, all these bisexuals wouldn't be friends with me!"

Really? I would argue that friendship doesn't work that way. That's not what friendship means. Even if using hypothetical friends to deflect criticism wasn't a reductive, dehumanizing way to talk about your friends (and, I'm afraid, it is!), it still fundamentally misunderstands what being friends entails. Do you have any friends you agree with entirely, condone wholeheartedly? Friends who never make mistakes, never make you roll your eyes, never make you need to change the subject? I am certain that I am never capable of being such a flawless friend. And I don't expect my friends to be any such thing, either.

But perhaps this is what Biggins imagines: that bisexuals are only ever friends with people totally free of biphobia. Does he think it's possible for us to take a "zero-tolerance" approach? I fear so; why else would he mention his bisexual friends in reference to his biphobia?

Biphobia is so widespread that I don't feel I have the luxury of shunning anyone who ever commits it. Getting people to even acknowledge that biphobia is a thing is such a struggle. It's so pervasive that if I decided not to associate with anyone who ever did anything biphobic...it'd have left me even more lonely than I sometimes have been! I've heard biphobic shit from mates. What if one of them, one day, was challenged on it and said "Oh I can't be biphobic, I'm friends with a bisexual," thinking of me? I could imagine it happening. My friendship shouldn't be taken as a certificate absolving anyone of biphobia.

His comments about bis and bisexuality confuse bisexual identity, which is what he disparages and blames for everything in these comments, with bisexuals' behavior, which of course is as varied as that of any other group.

And in the same way, he wants us to care about his identity as Not In Any Way Bigoted more than we care about his behavior in these nasty things he said.

I don't care what he is (or says he is), I care what he does.

(no subject)

Date: 2016-08-07 07:24 pm (UTC)
miss_s_b: River Song and The Eleventh Doctor have each other's back (Default)
From: [personal profile] miss_s_b
In news that will blow Biggins's mind: bisexuals can be biphobic. Internalised biphobia is a thing. If BEING a bisexual doesn't magically protect you from biphobia then being friends with us...

(no subject)

Date: 2016-08-07 07:37 pm (UTC)
From: [personal profile] magister
He's also pointed out that one of his friends is very Jewish and that he knows lots of black people.

Bingo?

(no subject)

Date: 2016-08-07 08:11 pm (UTC)
alatefeline: Painting of a cat asleep on a book. (Default)
From: [personal profile] alatefeline
*applause*

(no subject)

Date: 2016-08-07 09:02 pm (UTC)
sir_guinglain: (Default)
From: [personal profile] sir_guinglain
Like many gay men, he was once married to a woman. I wonder which issues of personal history are being exposed here.

(no subject)

Date: 2016-08-08 04:46 pm (UTC)
silveradept: A kodama with a trombone. The trombone is playing music, even though it is held in a rest position (Default)
From: [personal profile] silveradept
Ah, yes, thank you for articulating something that is helpful to me and in no way related to this at all.

As for what the person said, zed oh em gee, it's one every time something becomes unacceptable fit one group, the people saying it just move on to another group. This ground has already been tread multiple times!

(no subject)

Date: 2016-08-14 02:16 pm (UTC)
From: (Anonymous)
The unspoken follow-up seems to be "if I were biphobic, all these bisexuals wouldn't be friends with me!"

Surely it's the other way around: 'if were biased against group X, then why would I want to be friends with group X? The fact that I'm friends with members of group X must prove that I an not prejudiced against them'.

That's clearly the thinking behind, 'I'm not racist, I have black friends': racist people are people who are prejudiced against black people. If I were prejudiced against black people, I wouldn't have any black friends, because I would never have met them due ot being prejudiced against them. So the fact I do have black friends means I can't be prejudiced against black people, so therefore I mustn't be racist.'

Of course the logic doesn't work: the fact that one or two people have managed to overcome your prejudices sufficiently for you to be friends with them, doesn't prove that you aren't generally prejudiced against that class of people (hence the 'no, I meant the other ones, you're different' line which often accompanies this).

But I think that is the logic: it's not, 'If I were racist my black friend wouldn't be friends with me', it's 'if I were racist I wouldn't want to be friends with black people; I am friends with black people, so I mustn't be racist.'

Profile

the cosmolinguist

March 2026

S M T W T F S
1 2 34567
891011121314
15161718192021
22232425262728
293031    

Most Popular Tags

Style Credit

Expand Cut Tags

No cut tags