Fresher

[cosmolinguist]

Today I'm thinking about how weirdly well I fit in with the "freshers." No one seems particularly interested that I'm American because they're from all over the world too. So I get no follow-up inappropriate small-talk questions I am sick of answering about why I'm here or how long I have been, or whatever.

They're all confused about everything too so I'm not the only one who can't find the room our class is in or isn't sure if "tutorial" and "seminar" are being used interchangeably or not (spoiler: they are).

Comments

[sir_guinglain]

Paragraph 1: Hooray!

Paragraph 2: Oh dear...

[jesse_the_k]

How lovely to not be The Only One in that anxiety-rich environment..

[cosmolinguist]

Exactly! Makes me feel a lot less disabled too, which is a weird new feeling.

[sfred]

This sounds good.

[mrs_leroy_brown]

oof that twitter link - this, a billionty times!

More and more I feel like I identify with the millenials than with Gen X tbh...

[cosmolinguist]

Yeah. I mean apparently I'm the oldest kind of millennial anyway (because I graduated in 2000) but still, things are more explicit, less is assumed, boundaries are better with the younger sort.

[askygoneonfire]

Brilliant! I have been meeting freshers today (from the other side!) and reassured them all that not being able to find anything, know what you're doing, or what anything means is precisely normal and expected. Hope you feel more and more in the flow of things as the next few weeks unfold.

[cosmolinguist]

I hope I do too! I know where most of my classes are but I don't understand the library at all. And I just feel like there are tons of things I should be taking better advantage of.

[askygoneonfire]

Most university libraries run tours and induction events in the first couple of weeks - if you've not seen them advertised, I'd recommend asking if they are doing them or going in with a specific book you'd like to find and asking a librarian to show you how to search for it in the catalogue. It's a logical system *once* you've been inducted into it!

The first couple of weeks are always frantic so usually does feel like you're missing stuff that's going whizzing by but in invariably comes round again - or isn't as important as it seems!

[cosmolinguist]

I get extra help using the library anyway because of being blind, but I just need to go there and talk to them.

It's all a bit overwhelming though. I still don't know what I don't know, IYSWIM. I need to know what questions are good to ask at this point. :) It is genuinely reassuring to have someone say that anything important will come around again, though!

[askygoneonfire]

Good things to be doing/questions I'd like *my* students to be asking at this point (!) are; how can I prepare for seminars/lectures - what are good strategies for doing key readings, are there any skills workshops I can sign up for (writing in academic style, taking effective notes/how to manage your note taking, reading effectively), can I arrange informal but regular study groups with people on my modules. Just kind of getting organised is key at this stage. It takes time to work out how you work best and what sort of routine you want.

I think i said to every student I saw yesterday that "feeling overwhelmed is normal at this point"! It really is.

[cosmolinguist]

I know the answers to some of these and know how to look for others. And it helps a lot to know what kinds of questions I should be considering! I really appreciate the help.

[cosmolinguist]

To transcribe the tweets I made at that link:


My less-conventional friends understand the flaws in assuming everyone works and upon introduction asking them first about their job.
But I honestly feel pretty similar when I'm asked how long I've been here or why I moved here. I know people are curious but they don't seem to know that their innocent question fits into a pattern where immigrants must constantly defend our presence here.
Also, while I'm lucky enough to have an acceptable, mundane answer, not everybody immigrated for reasons that make suitable small talk.
What if the partner I'd moved here to marry ended up being horrible and we got divorced? What if they died? What if I sought asylum here?
It's a question whose answer is at best boring and at worst really fraught. Find something else to ask people than "why are you here?"
And I try to get better too at not pre-emptively justifying myself this way. "I moved here QUITE A WHILE AGO and one of you wanted me here!"
It's no better than the way I pre-emptively do myself down for not having a job when I'm asked that as small talk. Always trying to improve.