Ha, as if he has anything to worry about!

[cosmolinguist]

Andrew tells me sometimes he's worried that my new lesbian friends (even you, demiurgician) are going to make me a lesbian.

Last night I had a dream about meeting up with a random LJ friend of mine and hanging out at a carnival or something (I had an inordinately good time on the rides, even though I was by myself then) and then somehow we ended up making out...

She was a good kisser.

Comments

[stealthmunchkin.livejournal.com]

I think I should point out *RIGHT NOW* that I say that *AS A JOKE*, and this is as much as anything to do with Holly getting her hair cropped very short and spiky recently.
I DO NOT WORRY ABOUT THIS.
HONESTLY.
Just don't want anyone who knows me to think I am in *any* way prejudiced or actually believe homosexuality is catching.

[cosmolinguist]

Oh, right, sorry. I forgot a disclaimer would be necessary. Yes, people, this is supposed to be funny; Andrew is good and not bad. Etc.

[besskeloid.livejournal.com]

I could guess he doesn't really have a dyke problem. He doesn't seem oafish at all. No need for disclaimers.

[stealthmunchkin.livejournal.com]

I've found that on the internet a lot of nuances seem to get lost. Often when I read back posts of Holly's I come off cruel, malicious, or bigoted, to my mind, because the tone of voice is gone. My sense of humour is rather odd, and I don't like to cause unintentional offence (as opposed to intentional).

[cosmolinguist]

It doesn't help that I, who know you so well and am, obviously, present for the events and conversations and whatnot that I'm relaying here, sometimes don't notice the impression my actual words will have, because my brain can't help but fill in all the extra bits it knows about that aren't actually in the written version at all. I think sometimes I do--unintentionally, of course--make you sound unfairly harsh this way.

[ihavemanyskills.livejournal.com]

I'm an occasional reader of Holly's journal, and I've never thought her comments about you have come off as cruel, malicious or bigoted. No worries, man! Anyone who has followed Holly'd journal should know if you were any of those things, she wouldn't be involved with you.

[cosmolinguist]

Yay! Thanks for the vote of confidence.

[barrysarll.livejournal.com]

Homosexuality isn't catching after all? I'm aghast!

[cosmolinguist]

I think you Britishes have a less virulent strain on this side of the ocean; that's why you're not as worried about it as the sensible Americans.

[barrysarll.livejournal.com]

Or it's because we have fewer fundamentalists, so have less to worry about once we fall prey to the contagion. A sudden urge to watch Queer Eye is one unpleasant side effect, but it soon passes.

[besskeloid.livejournal.com]

Never felt that urge meself.

[stealthmunchkin.livejournal.com]

You'd be amazed at how many people I've offended in the past by *not* disclaimering everything that is remotely simillar to irony, satire, parody, or humour.
Mostly Americans, for some reason.

[cosmolinguist]

I don't think you have anything to fear from the people who read this journal; they seem to know better. But I do understand why you're worried. :-)

[stealthmunchkin.livejournal.com]

Remember the flamewars I've got into on here about, for example, 'economic efficiency'?
And that was when I was being *serious* ;)

[cosmolinguist]

I actually don't know what you're talking about.

But then, I haven't had any coffee in weeks, so I'm allowed to be confused by everything, right? :-)

[stealthmunchkin.livejournal.com]

The argument I got into back in March sometime, with the person who claimed to be a 1337 3c0n0m157 9uru, but who didn't understand basic maths.

[cosmolinguist]

I'm sure you're being ironic and all, but your use of 1337sp33k is still starting to worry me. After a while the pretense becomes the reality, and all that. :-)

Though I do like 9uru.

[stealthmunchkin.livejournal.com]

wtf?!!!!111 570p b3in 5uch a h47er! u r 53w cr001 !!!111!

[ex-humanfema327.livejournal.com]

wehey,

[cosmolinguist]

Oh, I bet you're just hoping it was you. :-D

[ex-humanfema327.livejournal.com]

No, i just want to watch

[irrtum.livejournal.com]

A from last night wants to turn stealthmunchkin into one for her lesbian bluegrass band in the sky. She wants him to keep the fluffy beard, however.
Oh and I'll jump in and say I'm not a lesbian la la la and neither is my girlfriend.

[cosmolinguist]

Oh dear. Lesbian bluegrass band... I gotta see that. And I'm glad she thinks he can keep the beard because he'll never ever get rid of it. He didn't even like having to trim it (yeah, that's what it is now, "trimmed") because he's afraid of turning into Noel Edmonds.

[belladonnalin.livejournal.com]

Hey! That's what I was gonna say!

[irrtum.livejournal.com]

Probably in a cleverer way though.

[belladonnalin.livejournal.com]

Nah, prolly not. Too hot to be clever.

[cosmolinguist]

But being clever is part of what makes you so hot!


Sorry, I know it's dumb, but I couldn't keep from saying it.

[stealthmunchkin.livejournal.com]

Speaking of which http://www.okcupid.com/tests/take?testid=17048238509886995797

[cosmolinguist]

What on earth are you doing looking at OKCupid anyway?

[stealthmunchkin.livejournal.com]

I followed a link in one of pope_guilty's posts

[stealthmunchkin.livejournal.com]

I got 76 on the test BTW. That's how bored I am today.

[cosmolinguist]

I got 68.

You're hot! You've read a lot. You've done a lot, and there's a lot you'd like to try in the future. You've got a sharp, sexy mind, and few inhibitions to restrain you from exploring all the pleasure you can get. You have few hang-ups, and there's not much you don't know about sex. You're open-minded and able to enjoy things that would make a lesser person squeamish. You're an exceptional treat as a lover, appreciated greatly by those who know the differnce. You were probably bored with a few of the people you've been with in your past, feeling like you had to drag them along with you in the sexual adventures you want to have, and probably dumping them for the same reason. It takes a lot to stimulate you; you realize it's not just about bumping uglies. In the end there's gotta be a lot more to it. Still, there is always room for improvement. Before you can graduate into a true sexual genius, there are a few things you've got to learn, to explore, to think through, talk through, and fuck through. A good place to start is in taking a look at the few things you're still a little hesitant to try. Break down you're last few barriers and discover the outer sexual frontiers, and you'll become a master.

Heh.

[belladonnalin.livejournal.com]

Hee. You're such a dork.

The WEATHER, Miss Complimentary Pants!

[stealthmunchkin.livejournal.com]

I can't do bluegrass. Don't have a high enough voice. You've got to sound keening for those harmonies to work - Don Everly is about as low as you can go.

[irrtum.livejournal.com]

It's probably part of the plot, to make your voice higher. Though I don't see anything wrong with lesbians with really low voices personally.

[stealthmunchkin.livejournal.com]

Yep. All you man-hating evil lesbians with your feminist/homosexualist/Marxist plot to take over the world are trying to castrate me. Everyone* knows that's the sort of thing you do.











*By 'everyone' I mean Dave Sim, genius comic creator and certifiable lunatic.

[irrtum.livejournal.com]

And stop you from eating little puppies and kittens.

[stealthmunchkin.livejournal.com]

But they're soooo tasty!
Not as tasty as cute ickle baby bunny rabbits with big eyes that look up at you imploringly while thinking "Please don't eat me, I wuv you" though.

[cosmolinguist]

Oh, god, that's terrible. I don't like you any more...

[irrtum.livejournal.com]

I sometimes feel guilty about eating so much spinach, as it's sooooo cute.

[cosmolinguist]

It is, especially the baby spinach.

[hexar-le-saipe.livejournal.com]

So they're making lesbians now? The wonders of modern technology!

[cosmolinguist]

Well, they have to reproduce somehow.

[paper-crystals.livejournal.com]

*insert toaster joke here*

[cosmolinguist]

Hello, I'm really dumb: I have no idea what you're talking about.

(I wasn't going to say anything about this, but I tried ignoring it for a while and yet my curiosity remains, unassuaged. Feel free to mock me for this.)

[paper-crystals.livejournal.com]

When Ellen DeGeneres a comedian from the USA came out as being a lesbian on her show Ellen there was one episode in the story where this women who she slept with in the show goes on this rant about how she isn't trying to convert people to lesbianism and one of her comments is "What do you think I am trying to get enough people for a free toaster?!" or something like that. At the end of the show the women gets a toaster. Ellen currently has a show called The Ellen Show and hosted the Oscars once.

[cosmolinguist]

Yay, I can be somebody's toaster!

[irrtum.livejournal.com]

I thought we got points for conversions, which eventually added up to a free toaster. I have never seen Ellen though.