Don't mind me; I'm just being weird

[cosmolinguist]

A few nights ago as I was trying to go to sleep I was wondering why I'm less happy now than when I spent my time worrying about school and money and life all the time, a mere few weeks ago. I decided that it was because I was not lonely then like I am now.

The last couple of nights I have dreamt that I was sleeping in my bed but not alone, and while I've had such dreams off and on for months now, I usually wake up to the unhappy realization that there's nobody there. This time it does not disappoint me when I wake up. Maybe I'm glad just to not feel alone for a time, even if it's only the time I'm sleeping.

Comments

[kalieris.livejournal.com]

I've had dreams like that too, and they do seem to help.

It's funny how little changes can be really out-bumming. My son is firmly in the grip of puberty, and has actually started saying "Mom, leggo. I don't want to look uncool." And then proceed to walk about 15 paces ahead of me. Well, saunter, actually.

Within the last month, he has started staying over one weeknight with his father, and started having a classmate over two nights a week. It isn't 'til tonight that I realized that I'm a little bit lonelier than I was a month ago, and I wasn't able to put a name to my discontent until you used the word.

It kind of bothers me that I was leaning on my child so much for company, or stuff to do. Blech.

[cosmolinguist]

It sort of surprised me to realize that the word "lonely" applies to me at all, but once I thought of it I knew it was right.

And believe me, I'm also bothered that my parents are my only source of company and things to do. :-) Not that I hate them, though young adults are expected to, but I think it should be obvious at this point that I'm not much like them, or they're not much like me, however you want to look at it, and that makes it less fun to do things with them.

::despairs of the fact that my dad's idea of a nice evening is to watch TV, and my mom's is to complain about what he watches, watch another TV, and/or play Spider Solitaire for a couple hours on the computer::

Also, ::hugs:: If only because lonely people can use them. :-)

[stealthmunchkin.livejournal.com]

=hugs for both of you=

[soltice.livejournal.com]

I've never seen anything but an empty bed in my future. I considered it a fair exchange.

[cosmolinguist]

For what? Nobody deserves such a thing.

[gentleman-lech.livejournal.com]

Nobody deserves an empty bed.

[stealthmunchkin.livejournal.com]

I just hope moving even further away from your friends won't make you even lonelier...

[cosmolinguist]

It's not them I miss, as such. I wouldn't see them much now anyway; we're all far away and going to be farther soon, whether I go to England or not.

I think it's just feeling useful and doing things that I miss. And that will be fixed when I go to England. :-)

[mllesarah.livejournal.com]

If it will comfort you, feel free to dream about me hitting you as you sleep. Ah, those were the days....
I hate all those hugs things, otherwise I would give you one. They are against my religion.

[cosmolinguist]

Ah yes, I remember them fondly.

Hugs are evil anyway. Ask anyone in my family.

[mllesarah.livejournal.com]

Well, I actually meant the stupid =hugs!= business. As well as *everything* between the stars. ugh. I think it is ugly, and I only included them as an illustration. Right.

[cosmolinguist]

Oh, sorry I misunderstood you. :-) Yeah, it is not aesthetically appealing, I agree.

[gentleman-lech.livejournal.com]

As long as someone, somewhere, thinks of you fondly, and you're aware of it, then you're never truly alone.

[hugs]

[cosmolinguist]

Damn, you're cool. I know you know that, but still.

[paninogirl.livejournal.com]

Yeah, he's right, Holly.

You should go into writing cards for Hallmark, you know. ;)

[gentleman-lech.livejournal.com]

And cheapen my talents by putting them to commercial use? Don't think so. The day I start charging money to make people happy is the day I want somebody to shoot me.

[paninogirl.livejournal.com]

::gulp::

[gentleman-lech.livejournal.com]

It's just a personal quirk of mine. I find it hard to like a company that invents holidays that make people feel guilty about their relationships with others just so it can force people to buy its products.

I like to make people happy just to make them happy. Not because somebody laid a guilt trip on me with an artificial holiday.

[cosmolinguist]

They're damn good at creating a market for what they produce, though. :-)

Not from me. I'm too cheap to buy cards, most of the time, especially because of things like the time I found a really cute miss-you type card and sent it to my boyfriend who was far away. I'd shoved it in the pocket of the cargo pants I was wearing that day, though, so by the time I wanted to send it it was bent out of shape, curved by my leg. So I wrote a note inside the card explaining this, with a diagram of the card and my pocket and how the one just barely fit in the other. By this time I thought I'd defaced my previously-cute card, but I'd done it in pen and couldn't fix it then, so I just sent it. And of course he said he liked that part the most.

Moral of the story: random things that are far too silly to make it on a Hallmark card are apparently better than even the coolest of the generic sentiments.

Moral of the story

[gentleman-lech.livejournal.com]

I agree. Random silliness is far cooler than anything Hallmark can produce. :)

[paninogirl.livejournal.com]

See, that's why I sometimes think it'd be fun to work for Hallmark. Those that know me well know that I send out things randomly for no specific reason/holiday. I make homemade postcards that I sent to people just to say hello. That's just how I am.

So, to have someone like me (or you) work at Hallmark would mean that we would produce products for those who just randomly want to let someone know they care. And that wouldn't be a guilty, invented holiday. It would just be the mark of a good person. :)

[gentleman-lech.livejournal.com]

That would be okay. But maybe we should have our own company, rather than trying to piggyback on the corporate behemoth.

That way we might get toastedtuna's endorsement. :)

[paninogirl.livejournal.com]

Ooh, that's an even better idea. If we had a successful company, we wouldn't have to worry about money...

...which would be very nice. :)

[gentleman-lech.livejournal.com]

Nice indeed. :)

[gifa.livejournal.com]

I work for Hallmark.

First of all... Hallmark does not create holidays, birthdays or funerals...So, the idea that Hallmark is somehow responsible for these events is ridiculous. Any Google search about the origins of any holiday can quickly squelch any rumors to the effect that Hallmark invents them to trick people into giving them all their money. Hallmark just provides product for already existing celebrated days.

In fact, greeting cards were not even invented by Hallmark...we just made them "ready to buy" for people who didn't have the time to get the images and words together in time for their sending situation. Hallmark's only been around for I around 75 years... long after holiday's on the scale of Christmas were established.

We also won't say exactly what you mean, because as you are all individuals with unique relationships, inside jokes and personal dynamics, we can't possibly say exactly what you mean...So, we have to say what we think most people feel they can say to someone else...they're kind of general and impersonal that way.

but, think of the sentiment on a card as a starting point for you...it gets the ball rolling and then there's all that space on the inside for you to add that unique special "you-ness" to make it your own.

If no one did that, everyone would have the same card on their counter or mantle...and wouldn't that be sad. But, there's only one card out there with a diagram of how it came to it's final shape. And that's the one you sent...not the one you bought.

Just stuff to think about.

That said, working here is sometimes fun, a lot of the time boring, and pretty trying the rest of the time. It's a job, almost like any other.

For those of you seeking employment here, good luck, hope to see you soon.