[170/365] manspreading

[cosmolinguist]

I've talked about fireworks as an audio manspreading, and English football fans are even more so.

They take up so much space in public by making it difficult to exist in their vicinity.

This evening, diffrentcolours and I tried to grab some food before going to see Elliot Page talk about his new book. But, since the place we went to eat is next to a tram stop, the area was so full of racist chanting that we could hardly make ourselves heard enough to order food.

We couldn't have our separate experience. They got to infringe on it. No one did anything about that.

The volume, content (racist and violent) and constancy of the noise all communicated threats.

For years, my friends and I have warned each other about derby days (where the two Manchester teams are playing each other) and other big games, because it's not safe for us -- queer, disabled, neurodivergent -- to go into town then.

So many people I know have stories of being assaulted by football fans just for being on public transport or otherwise trying to go about our day. Andrew's beard always made him a target. He got it pulled a lot, and it just drew unwanted attention. Once he got shoved off a tram at the wrong stop after they'd blocked us getting off at the stop we had wanted. Pushing us off the tram left the group of young white drunk "lads" barking laughter and with us having no hope of them encountering any consequences for this. I once got body-slammed on a train for the crime of not getting off it quickly enough for the hordes of young white drunk lads wanting to get on. More minor incidents go forgotten.

After having to let a few trams' worth of football fans go by, this lot finally got on one. Their racist chants were joined by them loudly banging on the tram itself as it crawled into the distance.

I really feel sorry for anyone else stuck on there. I've been that person, just suddenly inundated and there's nothing you can do.

Even if "nothing happens," it can be scary if you're vulnerable, and the sound is painful for anyone with sensory issues. The possibility of seeming a target of violence is damaging even if you're safely ignored...this time. There will be other times.

Anyway, all this contributed to the migraine now keeping me from seeing Elliot Page, ta lads!

Comments

[otter]

That's so horrible. I have had similar experiences - more in Europe than the US, because most everyone drives their own cars here. Which creates it's own set of problems, but less migraine inducing, I think.

I'm so sorry.

[cosmolinguist]

I'm okay...my real problem is that tonight feels typical. I was probably already heading for the migraine and it just made me grumpy enough to not shrug it off this time. :)

[bunnypip]

I'm sorry you got a migraine and sorry you had to miss Elliot Page - that sucks

We have a problem with audio manspreading with the motorbikes and little boy racer cars that speed past our house - and those aren't even men yet - they'll be horrible when they are.

[cosmolinguist]

Ugh, yes, we live close enough to an A road to hear those regularly too. Especially at night, my room is on the side of the house closest to that road and it sucks to have to hear them!

[barakta]

Yep, we get those too. Roaring round at after 11pm at night like wankers on the studenty backstreets of Silly Oak.

It's even worse than shouty drunk audio shithead students and I don't like them much either. We don't mind, but we've lost neighbours cos their kids couldn't sleep cos of the constant night noise (and stuff like constant littering of other people's gardens etc).

[barakta]

Fucksake, why aren't they policed better by football authorities.

Even when Footie fuckers are not as vicious and vile as this, I remember in Sheffield living a mile away from the grounds, it was the sheer swarming selfishness that caused us constant havoc. Parking horribly all over every street within a 30 min walk (too cheap/lazy to use public transport) or just barging anyone else off the pavements - used to have to calendar matches so we knew when to stay inside and avoid having anyone arrive/leave.

[cosmicjellyfish]

So sorry you're missing out on seeing Elliot Page because of these racist arseholes! I'm 100% with you - being stuck in a train carriage/tram car full of [team] supporters is a miserable experience that's only compounded if you're marginalised in any way or have other traits they might want to pick on. Like you said, you're permanently on high alert whether they go after you or not (and it's a sensory nightmare). English football culture is the fucking worst.

[forests_of_fire]

ugh. I'm so sorry you missed out on your event! I swear, so many sports fans just use it as an excuse to be a complete asshole.

[silveradept]

Oof. Racist shitheels shouting all over everywhere is definitely not my idea if a good time, especially if it stopped me from seeing Elliot Page.

I'm sorry about the migraine.